hope'n'stuff

[Keated]

okay, it's crappy, but I wanted to know what people think... i'd say 'enjoy', but i doubt you will. Feel free to laugh :P


________





With love comes the prospect of happiness or heartbreak.
With birth comes the prospect of death and life.
With hope comes the prospect of failure or salvation.
With sleep comes the prospect of reality or dreams.
With fantasy comes the prospect of delusion or fulfillment.

Everything around us has a chance of going either one way,
Or the other.
The choice may be ours to make.
It may not be.
Either way, we and we alone are the ones who must live with the consequences.
Caution may be prudent.
But it takes the fun out of life.
Flow with the wind.
Don't always expect the worst, as no matter the chance of success,
There's still a chance.
To ignore this chance is to invite depression upon oneself.

Where's the hope,
When you spend all your time guessing what's next to go wrong in life?
Where's the beauty,
When you spend a beautiful sunset, sad that it will eventually end?
Where's the joy,
When you look at a newborn child, and wonder how they will eventually die?
Where's the fun,
When you spend all your time with your friends, dwelling on the fact that they will leave?
Where's the love,
When you spend your relationship worrying about when 'forever' ends?

Things happen,
For better or worse.
One thing ends,
Another begins.
They will never be the same.
But as long as life continues,
There's still a chance.

Still a chance that things could go your way.
Still a chance she could say she loves you today.
Still a chance that you could say what you wanted to say.
Still a chance that you could be together, come what may.
Still a chance that it's not too late.

[frank]

Keat, you are hopelessly, madly, and unquestionably in love. And you are in love to an extent that can really only be understood by anyone who has or does love as deeply as you.

Your offering -- to the loveless, or to the unloved, may seem like a random, disconnected barrage of trivia.

To the rest of us, however, your offering reveals not only the depths of your heart and soul, but also the depths of your mind which have rendered coherent and meaningful, the questions most often asked by mankind.

Congratulations and thank you for allowing us to share your visions and your realities with you.

[Keated]

Heh, perhaps XD

Someone else has read it, and saw a couple of errors, which I'll now fix, and also commented about some of it sounding more like prose.

I guess I should try to fix that too XD

[frank]

How can you fix what ain't broke? Bah!! Maybe you can "tweak" it a little bit, here and there, which I notice you did, but the lyrical quality is still there.

Matter of fact, this work is so lyrical, that if 'twere mine, I'd find a way to work with a composer and you'd have a first-rate song. I think.

Unless you can pen the notes yourself....

[Keated]

Alas, I am to music what a blind, one armed, psychotic woodcutter is to 'friends reunited'

We don't really mix :P

[frank]

Then, so we don't get into trouble with a certain Mod of this forum who would tell us to quit with the "running commentary," I still think your work is fine free verse, and has a lyrical presentation that deserves collaboration with someone equally gifted in musical notation.

[Lady Vamp]

I liked it very much and looks forward to more poems by you!

[Lady Battousai]

aaaw thats so pretty!!^.^